Adventures in Parenting: Week One

We've survived our first week as parents. We've laughed, we've cried, and we've learned quite a few lessons...

Lesson 1: Unless you want to wash the changing table cover on a daily basis, ALWAYS put a clean diaper under the baby before the dirty one has been removed. Molly loves to wait until she's completely bare to let the poops and pees fly. This usually causes the designated changer to erupt into screams while Molly stares up, confused by the uproar. Occasionally, it's been bad enough to lead to an impromptu sponge bath, which causes Molly to join in with the screaming.



Lesson 2: A quiet, content baby is not a goal you should strive to achieve. She WILL cry and often there's no easily identifiable reason for it. She's fed, clean, warm, and comfortable. She just needs to cry. And for that reason...

Lesson 3: Grandparents are gifts from God! When all your baby wants is to be walked, rocked, jostled, snuggled and kissed, it's great to have the extra loving arms of grandparents around to give you a break.



























Lesson 4: Little girls love their daddies! Molly's fussy time is usually between 8 and 11pm. During that time, if she's not being fed, she wants to be with her daddy. Molly has fallen in love with Eric, and vice versa. Whether he's reading Reader's Digest to her, playing her a mix of his favorite 80's rock, or rocking her with his signature "airplane method", she's never as content as she is with him!
































Lesson 5: Who needs booze when you have milk?! I've never seen a human being look more drunk than Molly does at the end of a feeding. We call it her "milk coma". She turns into a floppy, sleepy ball of jello. She reminds me of Templeton the Rat in Charlotte's Web after he's feasted on the carnival food at the county fair. Ahhh...the life of a newborn...eat, sleep and be merry!




Lesson 6: Adjusting to life outside the womb is hard work. Sometimes Molly acts like she'd still like to be in her warm watery home. She loves to be snuggled close to her Mommy in her Moby wrap. Quite often, the Moby wrap is the only way that we could sit down together to eat a meal. And if every other avenue fails to get her to sleep, the Moby is sure to work. It makes sense that she'd like to be snuggled up. Afterall, that's the positition she's been in for the last few months. Even when she's not all wrapped up, Molly still assumes her curled up position. We call this pose her "praying feet". It must have been a favorite of hers in utero because she ends up in this position quite often.



Yes, the first week has held its challenges, but mostly it's been filled with joy. It's been absolutely amazing to get to know this brand new little person. It's hard to imagine that she's been living inside of me for the last nine months and now, all of a sudden, here she is...a whole new person, completely dependent on us to provide her with all her needs. We've been having a great time getting acquainted, learning about her needs and her personality. So far, we've learned that she's a spirited little lady who knows what she wants and when she wants it! She has pushed her boundaries from the very beginning. She's not content to lay still...ever! (unless she's in a deep sleep) She's much rather be kicking those little frog legs or attempting to roll over or crawl (yes, crawl!!!). All the grandparents agree, this one's going to be a handful VERY early. She may look more like her daddy, but she's a wiggler and climber like her mommy. My own mom had her hands full when I walked at 9 months and climbed soon after. Quite often, she'd walk into a room to find me attempting to climb on the table, the piano, the back of the couch, even to the top of the refrigerator once! Molly appears to be planning to give her mommy a taste of her own medicine! We've loved meeting our little girl this week and look forward to falling deeper in love with her in the weeks, months, and years to come.

Here are a few more pics...just because we can't stop taking pictures of our little snuggle bug :-)




Aunt Joy meets her namesake, Molly Joy.

Eric gets Molly ready for her first outing...a trip to church on her one-week birthday.

Molly likes to sleep the same way her mommy always has, with her hands tucked right up under her chin. No matter how tight we swaddle her, those little hands find their way out. One night we woke up to find that she had pulled her arm out of the sleeve of her nightgown and stuck it up through the neck of the nightgown, just to get that hand up under her chin!

Molly's Birth Story!

Saturday, August 8th started like any other post-due-date day. We'd been waiting to meet our little girl for the last 8 days and had geared ourselves up to have to wait for at least 8 more. Marmee Schillinger, who'd been waiting with us at our house for almost 2 weeks decided to take a little vacation to visit the other two grandchildren at my sister's house in Eden. So it was just me and Eric for the day. We decided to head to the bustling metropolis of downtown Mebane to celebrate SunFest, an annual summer festival with music, dancing, face-painting, and a motorcycle show. Little did we know, this would be the last picture we ever took of my Molly belly. While walking around Mebane, I started to have very regular Braxton-Hicks contractions. Eric started timing them and they were all about 4 minutes apart and 1 minute long. I'd been having B-H contractions for weeks and they'd been very strong for the last 10 days, so we didn't want to get too excited. They felt like all the other B-H contractions except for their extremely regular intervals. We decided to walk to the library and get some books and DVDs to pass the afternoon, in hopes that the walk would also help move things along. We passed the day together watching Citizen Kane, going for a walk in the neighborhood, napping, cooking dinner, and reading. I actually started writing another "waiting for Molly" blog-post which would never be published because the waiting was about to end...

Around 8pm, I started to bleed heavily. I knew from all my reading that this was NOT typically how labor was supposed to start. We made a call to the birth center and the midwife on call, Sher, seemed concerned about the bleeding as well. She told us to come in to the birth center where she'd check me and listen to Molly's heart-rate, but she said she'd probably end up sending us home. Still, we wanted to pack the car in case we ended up having to stay...and it was a good thing we did because we never did make it home. We agreed to meet at the birth center at 9pm, which left us only minutes to pack the car. We anticipated having a long time to labor at home, slowly gathering supplies and packing the car over a period of hours. But Eric did a fantastic job getting all the labor essentials packed.

Once at the birth center, Sher hooked me up the monitor and, almost immediately, I started having true active labor contractions every 3 minutes. I knew they weren't Braxton-Hicks because, instead of the tightening sensation I'd felt all day, they felt like really bad cramps, as though someone were wringing my abdomen out like a wet towel. Sher was a bit concerned because Molly's heartrate seemed to be decelerating and our little girl seemed a little distressed over the rapid turn of events that came with my quick-onset labor. After consulting with another midwife, everyone decided it'd be best to check into a labor suite and begin labor at the birth center where they could keep a close eye on Molly's heartrate and make a quick switch to UNC hospital if necessary. Well, it's a good thing we chose to stay because, by 10pm, I was in full-blown active labor and dilating quickly. Thankfully, Molly's heartrate steadied and she seemed to handle the rest of the labor like a champ. Praise the Lord!

We started playing Phase 10 with our fabulous nurse, Nicole, thinking we'd have some time to pass before labor picked up, but only got through 3 rounds before I needed to put my full concentration into relaxing during and between contractions. Nicole stayed with us the whole time, reassuring me during each contraction that Molly was doing just fine and helping Eric to coach me into relaxation. We passed the next 6-7 hours relaxing our way through contractions and trying to catch a few winks of sleep in the 3 minutes between contractions. The Bradley relaxation techniques we learned in class worked wonderfully. My favorite positions were side-lying, hugging my body pillow or sitting cross-legged on the bed, leaning over the birthing ball. Most of the night, I had no idea what time it was, how long contractions lasted or how much time passed in between each one. My only time-keeper was my mantra: "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." I knew that if I breathed this mantra through each contraction, emphasizing each word slowly in my head with each breath, then it took about 3 repetitions before the contraction would be over. It was the best visualization technique and it was totally of the Lord because I never practiced with it in any of our labor rehearsals. It just came to me when the going got tough.

At 4:30am, Sher said I was 7cm dilated and my bag of waters was "bulging". I was ready for the tub. The tub was FANTASTIC! The warm water helped me to relax through some of the hardest contractions yet. Sometime after 5am, my water broke and the road to transitional labor was fast and painful. The contractions seemed to come one after the other, some short and difficult and some longer and easier. Eric was such a great coach through this hardest stage. He constantly encouraged me, telling me what a great job I was doing, reminding me to relax, and supporting me, physically, mentally, and spiritually.

Just before 6am, Sher declared me "fully dilated" at 10cm, but said that Molly was making a "crooked entrance" into the birth canal and that it would be best if I delivered on the bed where she could manipulate Molly into a better position. I wasn't going to argue with someone who'd delivered hundreds of babies, so out of the tub we came. The pushing phase was, by far, the best part of the entire labor. It felt productive and active, like an athletic event. It felt like I was doing something about the pain rather than just enduring it. All of my walking, squats, yoga, Kegals, and labor rehearsals did their job; after just 30 minutes of pushing, Molly Joy Frueh made her grand entrance into this world, pink and screaming. It was 6:29 am. Her face was one of the most beautiful things I'd ever seen as Sher pulled her up onto my chest. It was like running through the ribbon, across the finish line after a marathon. I remember saying, "She's so beautiful. She's so perfect," and then looking at the midwife and saying, "It is a girl, right?" The midwife replied, "Actually, I never checked!" Once we established that, yes, Molly definitely was a girl, she snuggled into my chest to warm up and Eric cut the cord, the life-line that kept me and Molly connected for the last 9 months. She was her own independent person for the first time ever.

The next 12 hours passed like a blur. Molly nursed right away and then spent quite a few hours sleeping. Eric and I even caught a few hours of sleep after getting something to eat. I was STARVING after 10 hours of labor and really appreciated the lentil soup my mom had made and packed for our post-birth meal. Molly's first physical confirmed that she's fabulously healthy, weighing in at 7 lbs. 12 oz. and measuring 20.75 inches long. By 5pm, both Molly and Mommy had passed all the right tests to allow us to go home. Molly had eaten and dirtied her first diaper. I was able to walk on my own and my blood pressure had returned to normal after falling to 80/40 after birth. Both of our temperatures were normal and we were all anxious to be home in our own house. By 6:30 pm, Molly was home sweet home at 1223 High Ridge Road in her hometown of Mebane, NC. It was crazy to think that less than 24 hours before, Eric and I were sitting in this very same house, wondering if our little girl would ever arrive. And here she is...beautiful, healthy, and a true blessing from God. I wouldn't say the process of getting her here was easy, but nothing worth doing ever is. And I'd do it all over again if it meant having Molly as a part of our family.

The Waiting Game...40 Weeks +

If we look hot and tired in this picture, it's because we are! Today we're at 40 Weeks and 3 days and we're all growing a bit weary of the waiting game. I was really excited last week when the Braxton-Hicks contractions started coming every 30 to 60 minutes and were becoming longer and more intense. However, B-H contractions are now "old news". They've been coming at the same frequency and intensity for about 5 days now. They are, however, doing the very important job of exercising my uterus and preparing it for the marathon job of labor. At this rate, my uterus will be ready for Olympic weight-lifting by the time labor rolls around!

Today's Birth Center appointment brought some good news, as well as a bit of frustrating news. Good news first: Molly and Mommy are both still strong and healthy. My blood pressure is still in great shape and my uterus is measuring perfectly at 40cm. Molly's heartbeat is holding steady at 150 bpm and she's still impressing the Birth Center staff with her constant "belly dancing". There are always some kicking feet and jabbing fists at every appointment. In other good news, my cervix is completely soft and 1 cm dilated. In other words, my body is completely prepared for labor. The best news of the day was that Molly is no longer in the Occiput Posterior (OP) position, or sunny-side up. All of my pelvic tilts have paid off and she's once again turned so her back and butt are facing out (Occiput Anterior or OA). This will save a LOT of time and pain for both of us when labor does begin. Praise God!!!

Now the bad news: Molly does not appear the least bit interested in seeking an exit out of her watery home. She is still "floating" high and to the right. Her head has not dropped or "engaged" in my pelvis. Also, because she's settled so far to the right, she has tilted my entire uterus so that my cervix is pushed way over to the left and is no longer aligned with my pelvis and birth canal. Ah, this stubborn little girl. She has chosen a favorite place to hang out and doesn't seem too inclined to give it up. So we've added some new activities to our daily regimen of walking, pelvic tilts, and deep squats. We're also now going to try a midwifery technique called "belly binding" where a sheet is tied around my belly to try and align Molly's body with my spine. While my belly is bound, we'll also try some new exercises on the birthing ball. And if all else fails, extra spicy chicken fajitas are on the menu for dinner tonight :-)

In the end, it really is just a waiting game and Molly's in charge of the rule book. She knows when she's ready. Perhaps she justs need a little more growing time or maybe her lungs need to mature a bit more. Who knows? It's between Molly and God. The rest of us just get to wait and see.

(Eric got tired of waiting around to hold his baby girl so he settled for holding his other favorite girl!)